Upbeat Cynicism

what do you mean i lost my mind?

War of the Robots, 1978

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War of the Robots is of a piece with last week’s Cosmos: War of the Planets. Lots of the same cast and crew and sets and (not very) special effects.

The women are just about as attractive (and all of them still steadfastly refuse to wear bras under their stretchy shirts), the story is a little more coherent ((Which is not quite the same thing as making a little more sense. )), and the overall impression is incredibly blah.

A genius scientist and his assistant are kidnapped from Earth and taken to some other planet somewhere else. A rescue mission is mounted, which involves landing on another planet where a bald alien is made part of the crew (no genocide of the alien’s race this time around, though), and they get to the world of the robots, where the scientist turns out not to have been kidnapped at all, but is there so that he can carry out nefarious experiments. And his assistant is the empress. ((Nope, it don’t make a lick of sense. But it is, at least, clear. ))

There are some really silly battles in the ruins of the robot world, the empress takes over the earth ship, but all comes right in the end (after most of the cuties crewing the ship have met their ends, alas).

Oh, and the robots? Bunch of Italian guys in silver lamé with blonde pageboy wigs. (Thankfully, there is no disco on the soundtrack, or else my head might have exploded from the seventiesness of it all.)

So, uh, yeah, atrociously bad. But better than it’s predecessor in the sense that it doesn’t make you bash your brains out trying to figure out just what the sam hill is going on.

Cosmos… would have made a classic MST3K episode. This one would have been a bearable one.


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