Upbeat Cynicism

what do you mean i lost my mind?

Quote of the day – Bad Writing Week

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Gold sleeping under her eyelids, sleeping pills worn off, effortlessly obsolete as breath, their expiration reeling her fast from the silty floor of sleep to the surface, awake.

— Kate Moses, Wintering: A Novel of Sylvia Plath

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Written by [IMH]

13 June 2006 at 11:59 pm

Posted in Quotes

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  1. This is clearly a sample of the kind of thing you get from the “learn to silence your inner editor” school of writing.

    Will Duquette

    14 June 2006 at 9:00 am

  2. “obsolete as breath”?

    I could totally see that if the sleeping pills had been part of a suicide attempt, and now that she’s dead her breath is “obsolete” as are the sleeping pills.

    Still atrocious writing, but at least there’s a general sense of the words matching the intent.

    But how can breath be obsolete, when you’re still alive?

    Is the “gold sleeping under her eyelids” some advanced new oxygen osmosis technology, perhaps derived from the Roswell site?

    stutefish

    15 June 2006 at 5:17 am

  3. I’m rather of the opinion that anyone suggesting “a novel of Sylvia Plath” needs to be shut down right there, before any actual writing takes place. The result can’t avoid being pretentious garbage.

    Which this opening sentence demonstrates more than amply.

    Ian

    18 June 2006 at 10:53 pm


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